Picture Day!

Friday, February 25, 2011

And now... for the rest of the story!


Not sure how.... but we made it to Friday.... picture day....

Fed-Ex was scheduled to deliver our referral papers and files at 3:00 in the afternoon. That meant we would have to suffer through an entire day of teaching! I really contemplated calling in sick! My stomach was already in knots!

So the day went on... I was still in shock! It didn't seem real? How could this be happening already? I had prayed for this day. Dreamed of this day. Imagined what this day would be like. And now it was here... it was very surreal. I was an emotional wreck. One minute I was flying on cloud 9... the next I was choking back tears of emotion.

Every hour I watched the hands click by on the clock in my room.

Teaching was a good thing... it kept me very busy (as always!) through the day and before I knew it my Kindergartners were walking out the door.

2:45

Second grade was coming in. Last class of the day.

2:47

2:51

2:56

3:01

By now I knew our package... our precious package was sitting on our doorstep for us. My stomach felt like butterflies were trying to beat their way out. How fast could I make it home?

By the time I was in the car, I had my cell phone to my ear. Jeff was giddy. Literally giddy. I think his voice was an octave higher than normal and he was talking, talking, talking (not typical!). He told me every detail of a conference he had attended that day. But every few minutes he interrupted with... "Where are you now?"

"I'm going as fast as I can without getting a ticket!" I responded.

The route home seemed like it was taking hours, but soon I found my car pulling into the driveway. I jumped out. My stomach in my throat, my hands sweaty, my heart pounding out of my chest....

Jeff met me at the door with a Fed-Ex envelope in his hands. He took my hand and led me to the sunroom where we could sit on the couch together alone. His hands were shaking as he ripped open the package. My heart was thumping.

Jeff peeked in, grabbed the stack of pictures on top and pulled them out.

"OH MY GOSH... " he squeaked, his voice cracking with emotion, eyes filling with tears... "She's SOOOOO cute!"

Tears rolled down my cheeks as I stared at the face of the most beautiful little girl I had ever seen. Oh my gosh. Oh my gosh... she's beautiful. I could hardly see the pictures through the tears running down my cheeks. I just kept mumbling "She's so cute!" "Oh my gosh... she's so cute!"

We made it through the 20+ pictures, laughing, crying and pointing to her perfect pouty lips, her beautiful almond eyes, her button nose... There are only 3 other days in my life that I have felt such intense joy and emotion... my wedding day and the births of my sons. Here was my daughter.... I knew it immediately. I don't know how to describe it, but without a doubt I knew this was the little girl God had made for our family. She was conceived probably in December- while we were pouring over papers and researching agencies, God was already creating her specifically for our family. My heart swelled with such pride and joy for this little person I had never met. As we read her files and medical reports, I literally got goosebumps because so many specific things that I had prayed for were there in the report. It was not luck or coincidence. God had heard our prayers.

Within minutes the phone was ringing... it was my Mom (Grandma T)... a very anxious grandma waiting for news. With an emotion-filled voice I answered.

"Is everything ok?" my Mom asked in alarm.

"Mom... she's perfect," I managed to squeak. "She's so cute. Oh my gosh... we'll be there five minutes."

Five minutes later, we pulled into their driveway and shared the first pictures of their granddaughter. Between tears, they oohed and ahhed too.

That night, Mom and I attended a women's worship event at church. We were meeting up with my cousins and aunts. Of course, the pictures were gripped tightly in my hands hiding under some other papers. I was so excited. Within minutes, we were all screaming, jumping up and down and admiring the beautiful little face in the picture. Through the rest of the night, her pictures sat on my lap. I couldn't take my eyes from her. I memorized every detail of her face. I noticed both of my cousins peeking and smiling at her photos too throughout the event. I was definitely a proud Mommy! As my cousin wisely said... "you've got that pregnancy glow!"

That night I propped her pictures on my nightstand. I fell asleep with her face in my dreams and when I woke in the morning, she was the first thing I saw.

I doubt anyone will be able to wipe this smile off my face for a long time!

(I can't wait to show off her beautiful face to the world, but we are not allowed to post pictures until we have officially accepted the referral and filled out the paperwork. Soon I promise!)