Prayers

Here I sit with Adelyn snuggled up on my lap and I think... why me? How did I get so lucky? All of the things I dreamed about... her smell, her tiny fingers, her chubby little thighs, her pouty mouth, her beautiful brown eyes... they are all here for me to enjoy. Why me? I thank God everyday for bringing this blessing home to us. She is more amazing than I ever imagined!!

But there is a little part of me that feels guilty and sad. You see, while we are here loving and holding our precious daughter, there are many, many families out there waiting with grieving, broken hearts to bring their children home. My heart is aching for them. While I am so excited to share her beautiful pictures and milestones, these families are watching the calendar days go by and knowing that they are missing precious milestones with their children. They are missing first teeth, first steps, first words and first birthdays. And here I am celebrating these with Adelyn. Its not fair and it just makes me so sad.

You might remember awhile back that I had a very scary, sleepless night when we learned that the Korean government was not going to issue any more EP's (emmigration or exit permits). These documents are necessary for a child's visa and allow the child to leave the country. There is no travel call until a child receives an EP. We were so afraid we were not going to get an EP to bring Adelyn home this year. Our agency assured us that our wait might be longer, but that we would be traveling this year. Surprisingly, we received our travel call much quicker than we anticipated. In fact, it was only 2 days after being processed out of the National Visa Center. At that time, there were two other families that I had been in contact with that were also processed out of the National Visa Center and that we anticipated would be getting their travel call at the same time. We even thought we might be able to meet up together in Korea! But while we were meeting our baby girl for the first time and experiencing such happiness and joy, these families still had not gotten their travel calls.

We have now learned that we must have been the last group of EP's to be approved and that right after receiving our travel call, the Korean government has not approved any more EP's in June or July. These families that we thought would have been in Korea bringing their children home, are still waiting with heavy hearts. We have learned it may be two or three more months before they will travel. I know how much they are hurting and how hard every day of this wait is.

From what I have read (I am not an expert, this is just what I am reading), it seems that the Korean government has been lax in requiring Korea's agencies to provide post-placement information about their adopted children over the years. Even though the American agencies require post-placement reports, photos and finalization papers that are sent to the Korean agencies (Ex: Spence-Chapin sends all of our reports to SWS), the Korean government has not enforced that the Korean agencies (SWS, Eastern, Holt and KSS) send this information on to them. So the Korean government has said they will not approve any more EP's until they receive this information. All of the agencies- both in America and Korea are scrambling to find and provide any missing reports as well as adoption finalization dates to the government. Here is a wonderful blog post detailing this. It is so sad that the babies and waiting families have been caught in the middle of this.

To make matters worse, because the Korean government will not be issuing any more EP's to the Korean agencies this year, there are many, many families that have been notified that they will not be able to travel to bring their babies home until NEXT year when the new batch of EP's is given out. Some of these families who have received referrals of five month old babies, will be bringing 20 month old toddlers home. It is heart-wrenching for the children, foster families and waiting adoptive families. It is just a sad, sad situation.

These families have been on my heart lately and in my prayers, but I want to ask that all of you keep them in your prayers. As I celebrate Adelyn's milestones, I want them to also be celebrating with their little ones. I know how hard our wait was and in retrospect, it was pretty short compared to others out there. I can't imagine what these families are experiencing. Unless you have been on an adoption journey yourself, there are no words to express how emotionally draining... almost debilitating... this wait is. To have no due date. To have no control. To be at the mercy of governments and policies and paperwork. And to know your son or daughter is across the ocean waiting for you and that there is nothing you can do to bring them home... I have never experienced anything like it. These families need our support and encouragement, but mostly our prayers. For with God, anything is possible.